Saturday, July 10, 2010

I'll start to worry when I'm dead

Hey Sabrina, Blair, Kaelin, Ashley, Alycia, and James! Thanks for making enough sense of yesterday's completely jumbled and ramble-tastic post to leave a comment. You guys rock.

Today was another win, I suppose. It was probably the least productive day I've had in a while, although it was the most fun.

I rolled out of bed around noon-ish, threw on whatever clothes happened to be on the floor at that moment, and pasted some goop on my face to make myself look like a semi-decent human being, and began a three-hour Tumblr lurk-fest. I really love Tumblr. Like. Really.

Alison rolled up in my driveway around three or four-ish, because the two of us combined create one big mashed up ball of awkwardness and non-productivity and loserdom. We are basically both anti-social hermits. And that's just how it goes... I couldn't decide what to wear, and she sat at my kitchen table drinking some nasty parsley-tea (yeah, gross) that's supposed to help her with some health-issues she's having... and to make the unappealing concoction taste better, she decided it would be a smart idea to add in milk and nesquick... She drank the whole cup. I seriously wanted to gag watching her.

While we were musing around my kitchen table and trying to find ways to procrastinate and keep Alison from getting her Florida Virtual School done, the subject of chocolate chip pancakes came up. Alison, in her never-ending genius, wondered out loud what would happen if you baked chocolate chip pancake batter in a cake pan in the oven. And we instantly decided that sounded like a great idea. We asked my dad if he thought it would work, to which he replied, "uh, no." But, Alison and I were determined not to get anything of importance done today, so we drove to publix, where we spent an unnecessary amount of time picking out chocolate chips and awkwardly avoiding eye contact with some kids working a charity booth thing at the door.

Once back at my house, we whipped up some Aunt Jemima's pancake mix, tossed in an absurd amount of chocolate chips, and poured it in an 8 by 8 inch square pan. We baked it for ten minutes at 350 degrees (in case any of you are inspired by our ingenuity to make your own chocolate chip pancake cake), which we basically just guessed sounded like a reasonable time and temperature.

And the result? It came out perfectly. It was soft and fluffy, but not soggy or too doughy. It wasn't browned like a normal pancake. We cut it into four pieces, (one for me, one for Alison, one for my little sister and one extra), and put them on plates, with butter and syrup on top. It was seriously the most gorgeous looking piece of culinary excellence I'd ever laid eyes on. Alison took a picture of it with her Minolta, because it was that worthy.

And it tasted even better. Seriously the most delicious thing I've ever put in my stomach. Ever. Alison and I ended up splitting the extra piece. So good.

Alison attempted to do her FLVS on my computer but it just wasn't working out, plus our friend Bianca yelled at her over the phone for being unproductive, so she went home to do important stuff and I laid on my couch, moaning and groaning in sort of a sugar-induced half-coma, watching Princess and the Frog for about the billionth time.

My stepmom came home around six and we had pizza for dinner and even though I was so stuffed already, I ate two pieces because it was delicious. And now I can barely move.

I should probably get some college-related things done tonight. I think that's what I'm going to do.

I have no idea what I want to do tomorrow. I have a million things I should do, like practice driving and do laundry and study for the CPT, so maybe I'll place myself in social isolation for the day so I can get some of that done. We'll see.

Also I watched High School Musical 3. Which is only significant because Zac Efron... Well. That needs no further explanation.

I sure love you guys lots and lots.

I also love the song "If God Smokes Cheap Cigars" by Envy on the Coast. It just came on shuffle, and it really takes me back to sophomore year. And I remember thinking how much the lyrics directly related to a lot of how I was feeling about God and religion at the time. This was right about when my atheist beliefs were starting to falter on me.

I was in this place where not only did I feel completely abandoned by God ("if there's a God, why would he let this happen to me?" sound familiar?) but I also had a very "I'll believe it when I see it" attitude towards it. But I always had this ongoing war inside myself, because through it all, I wanted to believe there was something beyond this world, something more important.

I kept telling myself that simply wanting something to be true doesn't make it true, but what I didn't realize that I was just suppressing this faith that has always been inside of me. And faith, I believe, is what has enabled me to get through all the struggles life has thrown at me. Because my faith goes beyond just God and Heaven and Hell. My "faith" includes my faith in people, my faith in the human spirit, my faith in myself, and my faith that we each have something great to be working towards...

I'll save the rest of my atheist-to-believer transformation story for a rainy day, I think.

I don't talk about my religious beliefs a lot, (not just on the internet, but with anyone, really, it's something I hold very personal and intimate) but there's a taste of it. I am a believer in God, I try to be Jesus-like as I can (he was a cool guy), but I am skeptical of organized religion in general. In case my God-speech gave you the wrong idea, I am pro-choice, a very strong advocate for gay rights and I'm probably one of the least judgmental people you will ever meet. I just love Jesus. And I think that we're each destined for something bigger than this world.

Okay. This blog went from a story about Bree and Alison's crazy baking adventures to a sermon, and all because the right song came on iTunes shuffle. I'm such a distractible person.

Later y'all.

Weight: didn't weigh myself today, and don't care too much right now.
Twitter followers: 935
Why today is awesome: There are oreos in my cupboard, right now.


  1. mm I'm loving tumblr also and stuffed myself as well at the movies/ dinner. I decided to be lame and see Eclispe. I got a lot of dirty looks when the Harry Potter trailer came on and I loudly proclaimed that Harry Potter was way better than Twilight. I went on a long bikeride after to burn of the enormous amount of calories I consumed. I felt the same way when I was atheist. Now I am Buddhist but I understand your train of thought. I just can't bring myself to believe in something that only left me with unanswered prayers and a false sense of security (no offense). Buddhism is just a good path for me to follow. We love you too and your blog. :)

  2. that pancake cake thing you made with your friend sounds amazing. someday if i feel like i'll succeed at making food, i'll try to make that! it probably won't come out as wonderful as yours did, but i'll try. xD
    haha, i watched high school musical 3 tonight too. zac efron is gorgeous. i'm not really that big a fan of the whole high school musical movies, but for zac efron, i watch all of them numerous times. i am a creep.
    that start of your religious story transformation sounds like what i somewhat went though. i'm still rather skeptical of stuff like that, though. but yeah, religious views are very personal since it's a choice (mostly) everyone makes on their own. as long as you're happy with whatever you decide to be, it's all good as far as i'm concerned. :]

  3. You definitely have what it takes when it comes to food choice. Throughout the week I've been having some awesome soups, none of which Shana eats. Turns out, they're all YOUR picks from when you went shopping here! Excellent choices. Bree knows soup!

  4. I love you more than words could possibly describe and you make me want to write a blog sometimes. But no one would read it, like yours. Hahaha. <3

  5. I'm so sorry I haven't been reading/commenting lately! I definitely just read all your blogs since I finally got time. I totally relate to you on your whole "atheist-to-believer" thing. I agree with everything you said besides the pro-choice thing. Oh, and for breakfast tomorrow, definitely making that pancake thing. You should name it, by the way. Breecakes, or something like that.
    much love,

  6. oh, and are you confirmed? i'm pretty sure you're not but I'm just wondering.

  7. The pancake thing sounds delicious, I will have to try it sometime.

  8. a pancake-cake?! good grief, that sounds like the most incredible thing ever. i feel like i should try that.. this will happen. a proper adventure. i'll try and video response that bad boy. :)

    i don't tend to talk about my faith that much either. my friends are all christians, but we never really talk about it at all, so when we all sat down to talk about it the other night, everyone didn't really know what to say. i'm agnostic at the moment, because i don't really think that i have enough faith in christianity to be a christian.

    the world honestly scares me, and that fact that everything is so perfect pushes me towards the belief of a God. but i don't know if i believe in the whole backstory to where we are now.. like, Jesus is clealy an inspiration and a great 'man', but it's one of those "Did he really exist?" type deals for me. i'll read more of the bible, and i'll talk to christians and try to advance in my faith, but right now, i'm a little in the middle (put i'm closer to becoming a christian than an atheist; the world is too pitch perfect to be put down to a chance) and i do want to advance as a christian. we'll see what happens.

    good post, Bree! <3

  9. Tumblr is the best :) I love your tumblr
    My friend drinks tea's like that, she hates it, but it's helping her loose weight, supposedly
    Ooh that sounds really good :) I'd say if I tried to make it, i'd be very unsuccessful though. But good job!!
    mmm. you gotta love Zac Efron;P
    Oh wow I love Envy on the Coast ;D
    "wanting something to be true doesn't make it true" Is the best line i've ever heard Bree. your amazing <3

  10. Clothes that just happen to be on your floor is fun. I don't know why. It makes me sound gross. I do wash my clothes regularly, and only pick stuff off the floor once, then it's in the hamper, but idk.
    Tumblr is amazing. 'nuff said.
    I really want to try that pancake cake now. I have all the materials and I think I shall make it tomorrow. (: